Is there a cap to the amount of people a person can love?
I don’t use the word love lightly,
Yet, I use it quite frequently.
I have said “I Love You” many times,
It is true.
When I love it is forever,
and time holds no wind to its flame.
But as I look back upon all the lost loves of my life,
my heart aches,
my soul slightly cracks.
I have loved and lost,
but the love still remains.
My heart is tired,
Images, music, videos…
All reminders.
Am I simply a fool to have let so many go?
Not fighting when I could clearly see the crumble…
I find myself now fearing new love.
Adding to the ghosts of past loves that float in my minds eye.
Should I force myself to forget?
Deleting all evidence of our lives together,
Including friendship?
As new people enter my life,
I feel an urge to hide in my internal cave.
I feel my capacity for love,
I feel it in all I am,
But the haunting memories,
Pierce my soul..
I am tired.
And tired of hurting those I love.
But most of all,
I am tired of this aching heart…

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