Using My Disorder To Heal

I am in a heavy space. The demons of my past weighing heavily on my present state. All I want to do is run, to hide, to wait for the danger to dissipate before letting the light shine upon my face once again. I am faced with ideals and conditioning that have been placed inContinue reading “Using My Disorder To Heal”

Entering Into a New Life

I tend to have great periods of time where I am active here and then long periods where I lie dormant. Writing has always been the method in which it is easiest for me to portray my inner thoughts and feelings. Over the last couple of years I have gone through so much change thatContinue reading “Entering Into a New Life”

Eyes Open, Eyes Closed

Eyes Open, Eyes closed. As I walk through this life. My heart, a vast trove that spills like the oceans upon a rocky beach. Bubbly waters finding there way into every orifice of the earth that it touches. When I love, When I give my love, I give it completely. I love with a fiercenessContinue reading “Eyes Open, Eyes Closed”

Love is My Lifeforce

I have always loved romance movies and novels. Being swept away by a love so intense that it makes the whole world fade away. I made a profound realization this evening that I have never made before. I watched a movie on Netflix called After, this isn’t a review, honestly, I watch the sappiest ofContinue reading “Love is My Lifeforce”

I Am Lake Natron

I am being swallowed, consumed, by a blackness that I cannot escape. I feel it hanging heavily from every limb and organ of my body. I am like the Lake Natron, A beautifully deadly water, I will turn you into a calcified corpse. Maybe I myself am just that. Where Medusas stare once held me,Continue reading “I Am Lake Natron”

Breathing Life

Life is the sun on my face through a passing window, A hot cup of tea on an icy cold day, Breath in my lungs, Love in my heart. I feel the glitter of goosebumps on my skin. Every breath deeper and deeper, My stress melts away. And the heaviness falls, Like the avalanche ofContinue reading “Breathing Life”

Different Ways, Russian Doll Healing

I was reading an article in the magazine Kindred Spirit on the Matryoshka Method, developed by Therapist Cedric Speyer. In the article he brings up some key things that I never really thought about. He says that traditional therapies focus on our pain, the peeling back of layers of pain to find the ‘root’ pain.Continue reading “Different Ways, Russian Doll Healing”

A Scarred Sacred Heart

My grief has taken me this morning, like the hurricane takes the land. So gloriously freeing, and painful. Damn you wretched heart, some wounds go too deep and will never heal. I feel the grief pour out of me like a crack in a dam, it pushes until I finally break. Years of agony fromContinue reading “A Scarred Sacred Heart”

A Bit of Romace, Lessons, Pain, and Moving

I have been thinking a lot about relationships lately. All kinds of relationships but with my wedding right around the corner I have been thinking a lot about romantic relationships between people. I used to believe that two people needed to be whole before a relationship could last, but I am finding that this justContinue reading “A Bit of Romace, Lessons, Pain, and Moving”

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